The Mills Musings: Ellen Gardner Lee

Ellen Gardner, my great-great-grandmother, was born in 1839, the year Samuel Morse proved that his “code” could be transmitted by wire and the telegraph. When Ellen was eleven years old her mother, Matilda, died. Ellen’s father, Enos, was left to care for their three daughters.

Within two years of his wife’s death, Enos remarried and fathered four more children. He eventually moved his new family to Wisconsin. Esther and Ellen remained in New York and were very close throughout their lives. Below is a photo of them taken in approximately 1859. (See post on Esther and her family)

Ellen was a schoolteacher. She met a young man named Horace Lee, a widower with a young daughter, just before the Civil War began. Ellen wrote to her father asking his permission to marry. Below is Enos' response to Ellen. This letter describes the economic condition of the union just preceeding the Civil War. Enos also gives his daughter advice about her career, "learn your scholars all you can," and marriage, "consider well who bears the name you will receive.

Plymouth, WI

July the 23rd, 1861

After so long a time, I have got down here by the table with all of the materials for writing, but a clear head and a steady hand. The one aches and the other one trembles and if you get a letter that you can read, it will be more than I expect. But knowing that you have been too long neglected and supposing that your patience is near exhausted. I will do what I can to get into shape something like a letter. we are well as usual. At present, and trying to do the best we can in these hard times. When I speak of hard times, I do not attuide to anything in the produce or provisison line. That is abundant and like to remain so far we could hardly give away any kind of produce, but wheat and that will hardly pay for carrying to market. Besides the general depression of trade in produce. A want of confidence in bank currency creates a still greater panic in all business towns actions of quite a number of the banks not worth but about 50 percent, and no one willing to take them at that merchants, declare their unwillingness to take them to sell the goods and take Wisconsin notes anything that the farmer has to spare is down to nothing or under and no sale at that. How long this state of things will last or what will be the end. It is impossible to foresee, but one thing is sure, if things remain as they are, till fall, it will be hard to pay debts or get anything, but we produce ourselves. It looks dark, but I hope that some way may be provided that some bright prospect may appear to dispel this financial darkness, restore confidence and bring back a more sound and healthy state of business.

We recieved your letter dated 21st of June. We was glad to hear from you, but sorry to take so much trouble to get a letter and then be disappointed perhaps you have repeated the same before you get this. I should have written before, but supposed you would hear from us by Celestia, more than I can write and perhaps you would prefer to have a little later information. We are glad also that you are so well, and pleased with your school. I hope that you are equally pleased with your mutual good will and employer and one employed is certainly pleasing and is an evidence that each tries to do their duty while you keep school try to learn your schollars all you can. Do not be a worthless teacher, we have enough of them in our school for two summers. The children might as well stayed at home for all they learned, but very little. De Alton is backward yet learning under the care of those instructors. He has progressed, but slowly. Last winter, I went to work with him myself, the proficiency he made, convinced me that he has been neglected. This summer he has begun in small arithmetic, but makes little progress. I have neglected this summer to instruct him, because I did not know how to spend the time, but see that I must begin again or he will fall behind. Our little Annette is a good child and full of talk and play. She has heard us talk of you so much, she thinks to ask about ????(can't make word out) , as she calls you.

Oh how glad we should be to see you and tell and hear all. Much better would be than this half ways writing, but I suppose I should be thankful for this way of communication. I do wish we could be near you and Esther. It seems hard to be so far from you and be so poor that we can not come to see you. but I hope it may be different with you and that we shall live to see you again. Ruth has been to Sheboygan, two days last week to visit her sister, and she was up here week before last. They live in the city, now, but expect to move away soon. Your friends here are well.

Now as to that Private concerned. Do not know how to decide without a little explanation it is to much like giving judgement without witness. I suppose you think that the evidence is on your side and that your cause is a good one, and I will not condem till I hear the testamony if you have found a name that suits you better than the old one. I suppose you will have to change it, but consider well who bears that name. If he is worthy to take away your name, you have my full consent. When you write again, be a little more explicit and let us know what name it is that you have chosen and what his claims in life are or his standings are in society. Give our live to Esther and William tell them to write soon, and give my respects to Mr what ever his name is.

Your Parents
Enos and Ruth Gardner

Esther does marry Horace. Their son Fred was born a year later at the beginning of the Civil War. Horace, a member of the New York 10th Infantry, died of small pox within the next year.

Esther lived in New York not far from her sister, Esther, until she accompanied her son Fred and his wife, Ada, in their move to Huntington Park, California. Fred and Ada died before 1920 (see their post) and Esther lived with her grandson, Walter Lee and his wife Thirza. Esther died at age 87 in Corona, California. Here are pictures taken of her with friends and with Walter at his home.